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Another guideline for having a conversation about a problem is to avoid accusations such as, “You always do all the talking”, or “You never listen to me”.
Always and never are bad ways to describe something, and it’s more likely to make your friend defensive.
You’ll notice how the conversation feels much better once you’ve got to talk a bit about yourself and your life.
Instead of saying “You do this”, and “You do that”, say instead, “I feel ____________ when __________ happens.”This makes the same point without making your friend defensive.The other person will no longer see you as just the listener so they won’t talk as much.Also, when you share personal details about yourself, the other person will start becoming more interested and invested in you as a person.The sharing principle goes like this: Why does this work?When you start sharing more about yourself, you break the pattern of the listener’s trap.